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The American Guide to Surviving English Weather

Make sure you’re prepared for the copious amounts of cold and rain that England is famous for if you find yourself across the pond at any point this winter. If you’re used to basking in the Southern sun in  your short shorts (like me), then this one’s for you.

Here are my tips for surviving the cold:

1. Complain about the weather. A lot.

If you don’t want to look like a tourist, complain about the weather constantly. Especially if you’re sipping tea from your thermos while queueing.

2. Get a good umbrella.

Or else the rain will soak through to your very soul.

3. Two words: Waterproof parka.

The best thing about my long parka is that I can sit on the wet bench at the bus stop. Thanks, parka, for covering my ass (literally).

4. Wear two pairs of leggings under your trousers.

If English natives knew I did this, they’d laugh in my face. But it’s true — I usually wear two pairs of leggings under my jeans if it’s especially cold out. If it’s only moderately cold, I scale it back to one pair. Because I walk almost everywhere I go, the English wind has a way of blowing right through my clothes and chilling me to the bone. The layered leggings help combat that, and the plus side is no one knows what a huge wimp I am.

5. Wear a pair of socks on each foot.

If you have heavy boots or at least some durable shoes, then you probably won’t find this necessary. As a foolish canvas shoe lover, I find that my toes go numb if I neglect the second pair of the thin ankle socks I love so much. But I’d rather be stubborn than look like a dork with tube socks on. (No offense to tube sock wearers.)

6. Invest in a thermos.

Always carry a hot beverage no matter the occasion! It’ll double as a portable heater you can press against your face if your nose gets cold. (Even though I’m totally guilty of doing this, I am not responsible for any strange looks you might receive.)

And there you have it. I hope you have as much fun with your Michelin man physique as I do.

(Photo credit)

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